 The Extra Short Bus -Alex Farr It was a California-cold (which isn't very) November morning, and my fancy new dispatch computer gave me a trip in a fancy nearby neighborhood. Of course, it was a time order... for 15 minutes in the future, but the computer won't give a trip from more than maybe a mile from the car's position. I'm not so sure I really love GPS these days. But there wasn't much else going on, and it was an account order, so I was gonna get paid no matter what happened. And I couldn't figure out any way to find another fare to help kill the extra time, so I was just gonna have to eat the dead pay minutes. I rolled up to the house 10 minutes early, and even had the computer call them to tell them I was there. Then I sat, and I read a little, and I probably picked my nose some too. Killing 10 minutes at a cabstand is one thing... the uncertainty is just part of the game there, but when there's a fare just on the other side of the door, and I gotta wait for his mommy to feed him breakfast and tie his shoes for him... it'll drive you crazy. You see, the computer had mentioned that it was a kid going to the local junior college downtown, and that I was to make sure that the child was left with an adult. That meant that I was the kid's special bus for the day. Access to all the Friendly Cab accounts was sometimes a mixed blessing. I'll take the money, sure... but 10 minutes was too long a time to think back on the old Metro accounts, when I'd had to drive the drooler, or the girl that had an epileptic episode, or sometimes both of them, to the special day care home... "This kid's going to college though..." I reminded myself. The last girl I'd taken on the same account was no real challenge... she could even unfasten her seatbelt herself. "It won't be any big deal..." I reassured myself. Eventually the door opened. Mom led the kid out, and belted him in, and told him to wear his hat. And, at last, off I went. I made it about a block before he seemed to get really happy. "uuhhh, uhhhhhhh..." he said. "What?" I asked, turning down the music a notch and turning to see if he was alright. He was bouncing around in his seat, seeming to have a good time. "Right..." was all I could say, turning the music back up. THUMP! THUMP! I quickly turned, to find that he was knocking on the shield. Thump thump! "uhh uhhhh uhhh" "Right..." "uhhh uhhh" Thump thump! "Uhhh..." "You ok? You like the music?" It was the Rolling Stones I think. Thump! "Uhh uhhh.... uhhhh uhhhhh..." Thump! I just nodded, and answered "TIMMY!!" I couldn't help it. I wondered if he watched South Park. I wondered if his Mom thought it might soil his moral fabric. Thump! "uhhh" Thump thump! "uhhh uhhh uhhhhh" "Timmy!" I thought about the positive portrayals of the less-well-mentally/physically-endowed on the show. Thump! "Uhh." Thump! Thump! "Timmy!" I wondered if he would even be able to understand the subtle satire and wit of the show... Thump! "uhhh uhhh uhhh" Thump! "Uhhhhhh..." "Timmy!" And I wondered if, if he couldn't really follow the complexities of the show, if it could still somehow be ruinous of his moral fiber? Thump! Thump! "uhh uhhh uhh" Thump! "Timmy!" When we finally got to the school, I had to get out and undo his seatbelt for him. He thumped on the shield a couple more times, before I could communicate to him that it was time to get out and commence to the work of the day. There was a crowd of... well, young adults... waiting at the drop off point. Their eyes were a little glassy, but they seemed to be a little more on top of things than "Timmy", so I just handed his bag to one, saying "You take care of him?" The guy nodded, and even seemed to grasp the meaning of what he was doing... so I figured that was good enough, and I got the hell out of there. The trip was paid at a flat rate, after all... and spelunking through educational supplementary special education extension program protocols, for free, was nothing but a sure way to not make money.the New Waybills there's No Place Like Home... You gotta be shitting me Alex |